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One Week Post-op

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Alright, one week down. It’s been worlds easier than my last surgery.  Less pain by 1,000%... Better mobility by 2,000%... Far less swelling... A whole lot easier.  I went to PT yesterday (POD6) for the first time with this surgery. Marty panicked when he saw me and was relieved to hear that it was no damage done, and more of a clean-up procedure. He says he wishes I had more pain. He talked to me for a good 15 minutes about how an easier surgery with minimal pain does not mean that my knee is happy inside. He also reiterated something Dr. Z told me...my knee is not a normal knee. It will take longer to heal internally, no matter how good I feel on the outside.  Point taken, Marty. I will keep reminding myself of this.  It’ll be another 2-3 months before I’m back to exercising without restrictions. I’m starting now with quad sets and hip-flexor exercises. B-O-R-I-N-G! I go tomorrow to see Dr. Z and get my stitches out. Then I can shower normally. Right now I wear a cast cover over my k
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Post-op Day 1, for the fifth time...

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It’s not often that you go into surgery hoping the doctor is going to find something wrong. But that is honestly what I wanted, going into the OR yesterday to have a 5th surgery on my L knee.  To refresh anyone who cares to know: I started having trouble, again, around 6 weeks ago. My knee was getting “stuck” either bent or straight.  There was pain.  There was swelling.  The MRI showed maybe something on the lateral side (where the pain was) but nothing definitively wrong. After 4 weeks of rest and ice, it was no better. So surgery was decided on because there was no clear cause and there were worries that my poor walking mechanics would damage all of the work done on the medial side during the big surgery in November 2017.  So I went into surgery yesterday (13 months post-op from surgery #4) nervous and worried.  Nervous that they would find nothing, and that there would be no known reason for the pain and swelling.  Worried that this would be my new baseline after getting a taste of
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Don’t mind me...

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So I was going through my phone pictures this afternoon, looking for a quote I had set aside weeks ago, that fit perfectly with how I was feeling at the moment... ~spoiler alert: I was fuming angry and wanted to punch something, or run- run fast. It would’ve been one of those runs where I only had 7 1/2 minutes to run, so I would run a mile as fast as I could and amaze myself with how fast I can run when I’m angry, and I would suddenly realize that I wasn’t really angry anymore, and I’d be so grateful to have running to help me.  ...so I was looking for the quote I knew I had, and I came upon this picture instead... ...and I truly burst into tears.  Tears of pride. Tears of jealousy. Tears of “oh my god what I wouldn’t give to run like that again.” This is my own kid.  Finishing his first 10K.  Beaming with pride. It is such an awesome picture, and it was just bad luck that I came upon it when I did. Maybe not really bad luck though, because in a weird way it feels good to feel strong
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‘Tis the Season

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I went to the gym today, for the first time since I mysteriously destroyed my knee by standing up from my desk...that was a little over 5 weeks ago. I didn’t love going to the gym (I would always rather be outside), but the cardio felt good and I enjoyed watching my knee get stronger every week. So this “setback” really set me back mentally with regard to my feelings about the gym.  What’s the point? I can’t do anything with my legs, what else is there? So instead, I’ve done a lot of napping, something I almost NEVER do despite my crazy work hours. And some of you might think, “that’s good, sounds like self-care to me.” And maybe napping is part self-care but it has turned into self-loathing (loathing may be too harsh of a word, but it fits nicely in the sentence so just go with it). I have begun to worry that napping, and the need to nap, is a sign of depression creeping in... ‘Tis the season, right?! So today I allowed myself to nap AND then I went to the gym. And it felt good and I
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Are you there Blog? It’s me, Sara...

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Wow... It’s been more than 2 months since I last wrote. How does that happen? Well, I’ll tell you that life is moving in fast forward motion and I am running around (not literally, although I wish!) trying to keep up.  Somehow Halloween happened and I barely remember it...well, that may be because of the bottle of wine I drank that night, but still. Eyeless jack Aaron and Sara the Turtle Work...great but busy. I got a promotion and a raise since I last wrote. Yay! Kids...great but busy. Both are doing well with grades but requiring a lot of support and time from me with afterschool activities. We adopted another dog somehow. Well, I know how it happened, but adding another mammal to our home for me to care for was not part of any plan I had.  My 1 year surgery-versary came and went. I anticipated writing some big epic gushing post about how grateful I was to be feeling so great, but unfortunately I was not feeling well, and my knee was (still is) completely jacked, and I couldn’t bring
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I’m still here!

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Hey there! I’ve been MIA, and have not been great with writing. Did you miss me?  No?? Didn’t even notice??? Huh. Regardless, I am back. At least for this post! Yeah, so, sitting down to collect my thoughts, at least over the past month, just felt like something I had NO time for. I took time to nap on a few occasions. I took time to play catch with my kids more than I usually do. Those are all good things for me, but writing is also. Funny thing though, the longer I go without writing, the harder it is to motivate myself to get started again.  So here I am.  How’s my knee? Well, to be honest it feels amazing. I’m 10 months post-op.  My knees are totally the same size, essentially all the time. Extra activity no longer means swelling, even slight swelling. Prior to surgery, my L knee was swollen at ALL times, with or without activity, for almost a year. So I like having symmetric knees! The knee is still fairly numb on the surface. It feels strange, and I have to be careful shaving tha
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Overwhelmed, in a good way!

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Me, this morning, with Dr. Z and Lisa Well, this was a pleasant surprise!  I’m discharged from Dr. Z’s care! I know, right?!   Hearing him say it didn’t feel real.  Typing it doesn’t make it feel real.  But it’s real! This morning I went for my 9 month post-op appointment. I couldn’t wait to tell Dr. Z about the 100k bike race. I couldn’t wait to tell him that I can walk 7 miles at once. I couldn’t wait to tell him that most days when I get up in the morning, my knee is not the first thing I feel or notice or think about.  Once he picked his jaw up off the ground, and hugged me, and congratulated me, and looked at the x-rays, and examined my knee, he told me that I’m doing better than he could’ve ever hoped and that there’s nothing else he needs to do for me.  What???  “Are you sure? I thought we were going to be together for 18 months, at least...” He’s sure.  I’ve had no setbacks.  I’ve had no complications.  I’ve had consistent forward progress.  I can do things pain free and swelli
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